Sometimes Faith Is The Last Thing Standing

March was a stressful month, to say the least. But God had His hand firmly on our family the entire way. There was shock, fear, deep worry, laughter, tears, fun, family, friends, and deep, deep faith ~ all woven beautifully together like a tapestry of life, but which played itself out in a short time.

My dad, who was completely unsymptomatic, found out he had a large tumor (about the size of an orange) wrapped around one of his kidneys. This was simply due to the fact that my father's regular doctor takes such good, attentive care of him on a regular basis. Something routine didn't seem right, and his doctor leapt into action.

Consequently from there, he was led to an amazing nephrologist/oncologist at IU Med Center who not only took prompt and excellent medical care of my dad, but cared for my parents emotionally with compassion and a heart for everything they were trying to absorb in such a short time. There was no doubt it was cancer, and the outcome was unknown until he was on the operating table for the most part. 

I could not write about this at the time. I did not want to write about it at the time. It was mine to deal with in my heart and I knew that if I began sharing it, the dam would break. With all I have to hold together with my boys' issues, this was not an option.

I love my faith. And I don't mean I have steadfast, unwavering, perfect faith. This is not to imply that my faith is something for others to see and long for.

No, I mean this as a personal statement; like, "I love my slippers," or, "I love my pillow." My faith is my comfort, my go-to place, my port in the storm. Without it, I would be lost at sea.

I cherish it for many different reasons on any given day. Circumstances underline certain aspects of my faith that make me love it even more, if that is possible. Facing the very real possibility of losing a loved one makes me love my faith for the promises of eternal life with Christ that I rest my belief system on. Stumbling through another parenting quagmire keeps me leaning heavily on my faith because sometimes, it is the only thing that keeps me from losing my very. last. marble. Having a bad day or afternoon, or hour makes me so grateful for my faith in that - no matter how bad things seems like they are, this life on Earth really is fleeting compared to what is waiting for us in heaven.

If I accomplish nothing else in this world but lead my sons to Christ and show them how to lean on their faith when all else seems to have fallen away, then I have done my job and they will succeed in this short life. Perhaps not by society's standards, but by eternal ones.

photo by Cecile Graat

Comments

[Vanessa]

You have been in my thoughts and prayers.

[Holly]

Thank you, Vanessa!

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